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London
Calling
Here we go with the tenth ‘London
Calling...Oz’.
I mentioned last time that I had to rush back to Newcastle
after the Birmingham game and the last couple of weeks have been filled with
problems but I guess we’ve all got problems – and I’m certain you’re not
here to read mine (unless they’re football related!) but it has meant I
can’t go to Prague this week. So I found myself looking forward to a day
trip to Birmingham on Saturday. Lovely.
Actually I don’t mind the Hawthorns or West Brom fans,
it’s a friendly enough place to go (possibly the only one in the sprawl of
the West Midlands) and the way the seats have been put on the banking it
feels more like a terrace when everyone stands up. But we’ll come to
standing up later…
So, it’s Saturday morning and my alarm goes off at 7. In
the morning. On a Saturday. By about 8 I’m washed, fed, and on my way – with
the obligatory ‘ticket check’ about 10 minutes after I’ve left. I don’t
remember but maybe I lost a ticket for something when I was a child because
I’m terrible for repeatedly checking. Putting the ticket in a zipped up bag
next to me in the car doesn’t stop me checking it’s there a few times on the
way. It’s not just football tickets either, any tickets will do. It’s daft
really, because I could have a five pound tube ticket in one pocket and a
couple of hundred quid cash in the other and I’ll keep checking for the
ticket but never check the cash!
It was a grey, miserable morning, the drizzle was coming
down and there were patches of fog everywhere. Ah, the glamour of the
Premier League. I had looked at getting the train down but the best I could
find took 5 hours (it’s a 200 mile drive) and involved 2 changes before
local transfers. Not really my idea of relaxing (and I’d of ended up getting
home three hours later than I expected to going by car) so it’s just the
radio and me. There’s a lot of talk about an interview Sepp Blatter gave a
couple of days before where he’d complained about the effects of money in
football (you did read that right – Mr Confederations Cup who also wanted
the World Cup every other year to maximise FIFA’s income complaining about
money in sport), talked about women referees, and WBA putting a weakened
team out against the chavs. Cheers mate – wind up our opposition!
As for women referees the host decided that players
wouldn’t swear at them and neither would the crowd because they’re women and
people don’t swear at women. Cobblers. Now I love women and think they
deserve to be given the same chances (and no I’m not building up to a joke
about them getting the dinner on) and for that reason if no other I promise
you that if/when a woman refs an Arsenal game and fannies it up (I was going
to say cocks it up…) my insults will be just as vitriolic and heartfelt. You
could put Miss World out there but if she gives a bad one against The
Arsenal…
The radio was pretty dire actually so the iPod went on,
but I made sure the radio was on for the rather excellent ‘Fighting Talk’ on
Five Live at 11. It’s a simple as the host suggesting an angle on a sports
story and the 4 panellists pontificate on it. You score points when the host
likes what you’re saying and lose them when you waffle. The two highest
scorers have a fight off at the end where they have to defend something in
some way indefensible. You can listen to the show here
http://www.bbc.co.uk/fivelive/listen/audioarchive.shtml (along
with the Blatter interview I mentioned and lots more including interviews
with Thierry and Arsene. A page worth going back to).
Something else that caught my eye was a small piece in the
paper about bladed boots. Clichy, Senderos and Cole have all suffered stress
fractures on a foot this season and they all wear blades. Coincidence or not
Arsenal are looking into whether our players should wear them. Some clubs
(such as Manchester United) have already banned them and there is a campaign
to get FIFA to ban them. It appears there is a lot of medical evidence that
they can be problematic, and not just in terms of self-injury. One of the
biggest problems is that if they are not cared for correctly then when they
come into contact with flesh they can slice right into it. Obviously you’d
expect a professional to keep his boots in good condition but when you start
thinking how many park players there are for every professional you start to
imagine the potential scale of the problem.
One more thing I heard on the radio. A favourite old punk
band of mine, The Cockney Rejects, are recording a world cup song. I’m all
for it.
It was around 12.30 when I arrived after a few stops on
the way. The Hawthorns is half a mile off the motorway with plenty of
parking in between. Funnily enough as I parked up some mates from the
Blackstock were just getting out of their cars after a much shorter drive
from the opposite direction. We chatted for a while (apparently it’s the
ground that’s highest above sea level but I’m not sure if that was in the
Premiership or whole league). When I get to a ground I like to have a stroll
around if there’s time. I was looking at the ground when Ken Friar (Mr
Arsenal if anyone is) and Keith Edelman (not Mr Arsenal) were walking the
other way. Fortunately they were gone before I realised or I’d have had to
have a go at Edelman for his treatment of bondholders. I may have mentioned
that I bumped into Ken with David Dein many years ago and was quite rude to
Dein before apologising to Ken for my language so in a way I’m glad I didn’t
have to apologise to an often overlooked Arsenal legend.
So I’m still a bit nonplussed when an old bloke comes up
to me and asks if I’m an Arsenal fan. I’m thinking ‘nutter’ due to the fact
that I’m stood outside the ground wearing an Arsenal shirt but just said
‘yes’. He says he’s with the News of the World and would I mind answering a
few questions. Why not? Basically, he asked if I thought Titi would sign
next summer and I said ‘Yes, 100%’. He spent the next five minutes asking me
various questions about why and stuff so I decided that I’d break the habit
of a lifetime and buy the rag on Sunday. (I did. All the wonderful,
insightful comments I’d made were reduced to ‘Because he’s got no reason
to’. Oh well, lesson learnt.)
Another couple of quick things I noticed. As the various
WBA players went in nearly all of them stopped to let people take photos
when asked. The way many players are these days (to the fans) it was nice to
see. And when the Arsenal coach arrived the sun came out…
Into the ground and another variation on the ticket
concept. There’s a barcode on the ticket and you put it into a reader.
Worked fine for me (and no one else mentioned problems) but I’m not really
sure how having a steward at every turnstile explaining you have to put your
card in this slot is any quicker than having someone rip the counterfoil
off…
No clock in the ground, which is always a gripe of mine,
and I ended up sitting next to a right weirdo. Far too chatty and I got his
life story. Told me how he’d supported his home town club until he went to
University where more people supported Arsenal so he switched (!!??!?!?). He
also said how he worked for one of the largest government departments in
procurement and spent all his time at a computer screen ordering stuff. Next
he started talking about the Arsenal magazine and how he only looked at the
pictures because he was badly dyslexic. I’m thinking no wonder there’s so
much government wastage.
Thank God the match started! Mind you it was without Hleb,
Henry, Cole, Campbell, van Persie, Gilberto and soon enough Ljungberg. These
injuries are getting ridiculous and it wouldn’t be so bad if so many of them
weren’t on international duty. Added to that Pires was playing. Now I love
Pires as a player and think talk of selling him is ludicrous but from
Saturdays performance it does appear that his legs have gone. Mind you with
his ability to score from close in I’d pick him on the bench every week, to
come on for the last 20 and nick a goal if needed.
I’ve got to comment on the absolutely clueless stewarding
though. They obviously have a bee in their bonnet about people standing up
and the steward nearest us was constantly trying to get us to sit down when
we weren’t. I tried to explain to him that telling the people at the back to
sit down whilst those in front were standing was a non-starter. ‘But this is
my job’ he said. Honestly. I suggested that maybe starting at the front
might be an idea, which just seemed to confuse him all the more. I had a
(friendly) word with one of the head stewards afterwards and whilst he was
sympathetic his reason was, basically, ‘well some of the stewards are a bit
stupid’. Well that’s alright then.
It’s all doom and gloom at the moment but I’ve seen a lot
of good and bad teams at Arsenal in the last 30 years and I’ve seen a lot of
good teams go bad. This is a very good team in a lull. Absolutely nothing
more. Mind you Kanu really annoyed me. The passport-wielding brothel
visiting forward put more effort into that 90 minutes than his last two
years at Highbury. If he’d actually played anything like as hard for Arsenal
he would have been a regular easily. Git.
I said the other week about luck being our enemy and the
chavs best friend this season but we lost to two stunning goals and yet
again the opposition keeper was man of the match. It’s really difficult to
say a team is playing that badly when the opposition keeper keeps being
awarded man of the match! And I must mention that they were 0-1 to Bolton at
home on Saturday when Essien only got a yellow for as bad an over the top
challenge as you’ll ever see. Bolton also hit the bar and at half time the
‘fans’ booed the chavs off the pitch. I honestly believe the Roman Empire is
just a couple of bad results away from imploding.
Back with Arsenal there have been a lot of comparisons
between Senderos and Tony Adams and I’ve noticed another. One thing I used
to love about TA was the way he ambled up for corners. All the other players
jog in there and start pushing and shoving but TA would just stroll up there
just in time for the corner to be taken. Swiss Tone was doing that every
time Saturday, and obviously he reaped the rewards with his goal. There does
appear to be a problem in his game that needs sorted and that’s how easily
some centre forwards get a grip on him. I’ve every faith that with more
experience and coaching he’ll learn but I think opposition forwards have
noticed that in his game and are targeting it as a weakness. He’s a strong
guy but he’s got to learn to not give forwards the chance to grab hold of
him.
Someone’s going to get a right spanking of us soon. I was
thinking that on the way back and making good time as I pulled off for
something to eat. As it was around 8 on a Saturday evening I was a bit
surprised there was a queue and I was impatient enough to decide to go on to
the next service station. I’m happily bombing down a fairly clear motorway
(everyone else must have stopped for dinner) at 90mph when BLAM my front
nearside tyre exploded. I’m talking F1 style with bits of rubber flying.
Probably as much by luck as by judgement (and thankful that hunger had
struck so many) I managed to get the car to the hard shoulder without
causing harm to anything except my heart. In all honesty when I got out of
the car my knees buckled a bit. Quite a bit!
Last week I caught a nail in a tyre and had dropped it off
to be fixed Friday and hadn’t had a chance to collect it so I had no spare.
Bugger. Over two hours later, and nearly £200 lighter I was on my way again
and was in the mood for nothing else except hammering it home. Which I did.
It was after midnight when I finally got home. Would have
been quicker by train (and cheaper as it worked out) Stomped in and made
myself a drink. Sat down and realised I could hear my cat crying out. She’d
been shut in my bedroom all day! Now after over 14 hours shut in there I
obviously thought the worst but she ran straight to her tray and the room
was clear. Maybe my lucks changing…
Come On You Red(currant)s!
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